Swine flu. Run for my life!
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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