You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
