No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize
