that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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