I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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