Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
