took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize
