I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
The Olympian is in my bed
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
