my vag is so smooth its legendary
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
