I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
