Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
tell me about the fingering
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