I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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