Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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