Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
