It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize