you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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