Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
