Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
pray to the hookup gods
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
