are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
