So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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