ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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