i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
