scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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