IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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