Umm I'm too high to move.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
