Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
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