Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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