She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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