This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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