she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
