He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
