It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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