I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
