She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize