All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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