the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
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