i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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