College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
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