Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
