They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize