If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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