feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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