i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
