The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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