East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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