This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
