Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize