just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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