I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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