I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
